The American Re-EDucation Association
The American
Re-EDucation
Association
Ceremony and ritual give order, stability, and
confidence to troubled children and adolescents, whose lives are often in
considerable disarray.
by Susan R. Fry, LPC, LSW, Executive Director
Stepping Stones, Inc.
Lavalette, WV
Twenty roses for twenty years; a moment of silence; please and thank you; "I’m
finished"; Blast-off and Splash-down; chats; wake-up, rooms then breakfast;
evaluation after chores; ten steps of a decision process; group business, staff
business and goodnight; a hat of honor, and little gold feet ...
"Ceremony and ritual give order, stability, and confidence to troubled and
troubling children and adolescents, whose lives are often in considerable
disarray." From start to finish, knowing what to expect is comforting. Daily
schedules provide an informative guide that facilitates the group process. Our
rituals: meals, groups, activities, bedtime; allow a seamless entry for new kids
providing and easy assimilation regardless of prior habits and norms. Rituals
are measurable, they provide the kids with both a sense of achievement when
everything goes fine, and a checklist when things do not.
Does it work? Do ceremony and ritual make a difference? During our recent Open
House, there were 18 kids, 16 hours, 200 guests and zero problems. Pinning a
little $1.99 gold-platted pin with three feet on each child as he is recognized
for completing our program has come to be the most anticipated and cherished
part of our graduation ceremony. The Christmas party does not officially start
until the bearded man in the red suit tells the story ...
It does make a difference. Rituals help to teach. Rituals are for all those kids
who have never experienced a sit down dinner or had someone remind them it is
time to study. Rituals can be emulated and turn into good habits. Ceremony is
vital; it is recognition. For our kids hearing "Have a happy birthday" is now
the expectation instead of the exception. Ceremony provides transition. It marks
a time when the past is acknowledged and the future can be looked forward to in
anticipation.
Ceremony and ritual give order, stability and confidence to the inexperienced
and knowledgeable staff also, providing support and a guide for them every day.
Staff, like children need to feel confident in their expectations, and when
ceremony and ritual are adhered to properly, they decrease anxiety. However,
schedules and rituals provide only 50 percent of the day, staff are entrusted to
complete the other half in a creative and nurturing interactive style.
Spontaneity is one of the keys of Re-ED; expectations both known and high are
the others.
Though I may be new to AREA, I am not new to Re-ED. The process and structure
has been a part of my agency’s culture for the past 14 years. In Cleveland I was
so impressed with the conference (my first but not my last); one of the most
significant events, was I felt, that final slide show session and skit. As with
Re-ED groups, this ritual was as important as the first one of the conference.
The opening and the closure provided a natural transition. Truly the adults of
Re-ED not only understand the need for ritual and ceremony, but they need it
too.